It is somewhat amusing to hear the standard sermon on children in our culture today. In fact, I can just about tell you what the preacher will say concerning children and their ways. Almost always these statement are taken out of context with no assumption that the child may not go to the far country.
The text of Luke 15 describes what is commonly known as the prodigal son. This is a story of a son’s rebellious nature to spend his inheritance on wild living. This is true because verse 13 makes his intentions very clear, “And not many days after the younger son gathered all together and took his journey into a far country and there wasted his substance with riotous living.” The word means to be wasteful, therefore, he wasted his substance that was given to him. Now exactly what he wasted it on is not told but it is clear that it was literally thrown away. I believe it would be like a “country” boy going to the big city and with all the modern-day sodomite type lifestyles that are prevalent, and throwing himself in the midst of it. A popular term that has been applied here is “sewing their wild oats.”
The question we have to ask ourselves today is, “will all children go to the far country?” In a recent sermon, by a local preacher, I heard the answer was yes, but I vehemently disagree. I must admit that as a young man I was trained by other men I heard in the pulpit on theological issues. Unfortunately, so were they and thus the issues they preached carried very little biblical doctrine with them. So, as I listened to this sermon on the wayward son it was the same message I had heard over and over again, not literally the same but the context was the same and it was still wrong.
I want to compare common statements that I have heard and even made myself in my early years that just simply are not biblical but are generally made out of ignorance.
First, there is the statement that “even home schooled kids are rough as cobs”. When this statement was made I was at first shocked. Not because we home school our children and they are perfect, they’re not. But I was shocked at the response that was from the crowd of 150 or so people. It was nothing but “amen’s.” None to my knowledge, and I did not know them all, were home schooling families. Now let’s be clear that there are no perfect home schooling families. But to make that statement shows the lack of knowledge about home schooling. Parents’ home school because of two primary reasons. One is because of religious reasons. Many home school families are Christians. The second falls into line of those conservative families that are tired of the influence and danger that exists in the public school system. Whatever the reasons are to throw the “even home-schooled kids are going to go into the far country” is like throwing the baby out with the bath water.
I did not get the chance to ask him who made the statement but I would like to know the stats he has on that. I know my children are not perfect, we are all rebellious in nature and have a tendency to follow the lust of the flesh. That’s the product of sin and its evil work. I hate sin and what it has done to God’s perfect creation. But back to the statement about home schoolers being as rough as cobs. He assumed that home schooling won’t make a difference. He is dead wrong. Can you be taught the Bible at public school? Can you be taught biology in an environment (public school) that denies the author of life? Can you teach geology as laid out in the first few chapters of Genesis in a public school? Can you teach marriage viewed in the eyes of God in a public school? No. Thus we have attainted that home schooled children are going to get more biblical education than those at public schools. The influence of drugs, crime, sex, alcohol, humanism, evolution, immodesty, secular dress and many other things that the public school offers are not going to be present in most home school environments.
Statistically the chances of having your children develop a biblical worldview are far greater if they are educated by mom and dad in biblical life skills, not humanistic skills offered by the public school system. As Michael Pearl on No Greater Joy Ministries states, “We are not rebels; quite the opposite; we are just the minority who refuse to join a rebellion against God and the truth. We are taking our children to the tree of life growing beside the fountain of knowledge to be refreshed by the Author of life. We will not stoop for anything less. We will not compromise. We will not allow state testing to dictate our curriculum. They have made their position on God and morality clear. We are making our position clear. We will not attend their party, dance to their tune, or employ their fiddler.” No home school parent can guarantee that all children will become believers but the chances are greater.
The second false statement I often hear is “you just have to let them go.” It’s called “tough-love” in the secular terms of our day. But, if they are venturing, you best do more that let them go. You better intercede. By praying and taking the time to teach them the implications of sin. Don’t threaten them with hell if they continue, although they will if they don’t repent, but teach them the consequences of sin. Show them specifics in the Bible about the dangers of rebellion.
Third, the statement was made that his child went to the far country because there was too much “God” in the house. I find this hard to believe and a very ignorant statement. He was implying that around his house that it was a spirit filled house. Thus, the message he sent to young people in the crowd was that if mom and dad are talking religion at home then just bail out because you will always come back. This was terrible advice. Not only bad advice but unscriptural as well.
There are a few problems with this statement. It seems that maybe he was thinking it was the church’s responsibility to give his child or children spiritual direction. Many parents assume today (as I once did) that the church will give their children all the correct direction in their life. We somehow assume that 45 minutes in a Sunday school class or a youth group will be able to combat the evils of a secular world. Parents now can push all that onto the youth ministries and spend precious time watching CSI at home and not take the time to disciple their children because it is in the hands of an educated youth minister.
After years of taking their children to church they accept the idea that many children will go out to sew their wild oats because of all that church they got growing up. The problem is that all they got was church. They received nothing (probably) when they were at home. I can only imagine because I have seen this first hand that the homes of many of these faithful church members are carnally filled with secular music, programs (TV) and dress. There doesn’t seem to be a connection between the two, i.e. the church and the home. The too much God in their home statement was not a regular routine of discipleship. It was not authentic and the child saw that. He saw that it was just a routine to go to church, say amen and be there every time the doors were opened, but at home it was not the same way. Maybe the child didn’t see too much God but too much hypocrisy.
Fourth, the statement was made that when they get their “belly full” they will come back. Again, not a theological statement and it offers false hope to parents about their children and gives a false sense of security to youth. I have known people who have got their belly full in the far country and now have a reprobate mind. They have never repented but have become cold towards God. They may never repent.
The statement was taken from the text, but it is generally taken out of context to fit the preacher or teacher’s guide. In Luke 15:17 says, “And when he came to himself…” Yes, the fun had run out for him and he realized the promise of the devil only left him playing with the hogs. That is what sin does. It’s horrible, and it leaves ugly stains upon our life. When we go our own way, we will always end up with the hogs. What makes a man come to himself? When the Holy Spirit draws him that’s when. Its not when he gets “tired” of his lifestyle. Only when a holy God draws him will he be given the opportunity to believe. Whatever brought this man to himself it was a divine act of God. Keep in mind that this is a parable, which is an earthly story with a heavenly meaning. Thus, whatever brings men to Christ today in their state of rebellion is an act of God, not an act of them deciding to change. God has and is the only one that can make that clear.
One of the troubling things I didn’t hear in this message and it could have saved it, but it was simply left out. We left feeling that there was only one thing to look forward to and that’s the real chance of our children going to the far country. Of course, since we were home schooling that would have no difference because he made the ignorant statement about even home schoolers being “rough as cobs.” I believe biblical comments could have saved this message or at least gave it some hope. I would like to offer these suggestions and would have offered them to the crowd of people listening in defense of this bad exegesis.
We as parents need the assurance of God’s word to raise our children. Many truly desire to raise them in the nurture and admonition of the Lord. When sermons like this are preached they only seem to provide what to do after they have rebelled. What does the Bible say about rearing these precious souls? Well, I didn’t hear anything about this while listening to this sermon.
First, there is the mandate that parents be responsible for the education of their children. Deuteronomy 6:6,7 “And thou shalt teach them diligently unto thy children, and shalt talk of them when thou sittest in thine house, and when thou walkest by the way, and when thou liest down, and when thou risest up. And thou shalt bind them for a sign upon thine hand, and they shall be as frontlets between thine eyes.” The mandate from this passage tells parents, and especially fathers, that the education or discipleship of their children is up to them. It is not the church’s responsibility to form a youth group geared towards the secular rebellious hearts of young people that tries to teach the gospel on their level. The Word of God is on their level, and it is commanded that parents teach them.
We are instructed to share with them the glorious works of God when we sit down with them. This is a good time for family worship. Turn off the TV and put away the tools for that old car and as a family sit down and sing songs that honor God. Fathers should take the role to open up the Bible and teach doctrine. Talk to them about being saved, the effects of sin, and the decisions they must make. Show them the Words of the living God whom has power to save and change their hearts.
When you walk by the way. In everyday life there are opportunities to teach children. Look at the storm clouds and say God is in that. Take them to the mountains or even the great wonders of the world and show them that God’s hand is in that. When you rise and lay down teach them. In other words, make your home a place where you extol the greatness of our God.
Finally, let me be very pragmatic concerning the spiritual teaching of our children. Youth groups are oftentimes based upon the fleshly concerns and are generally corrupt and even usurp the biblical authority of the parents. Too many parents believe that as long as they get their children in these youth groups they will find what God wants them to be. Not according to the text we just read, it is the parent’s job. Today if parents do not let their children, i.e. teens, participate in the youth programs, they are looked at as ones that are depraving their child’s spiritual growth. Parents, you have good reason to be concerned with the spirituality of those who lead and coordinate the youth groups. Listen to the answer given by Michael Pearl when a lady asked about why she feels pressured to let her child go to the youth group. “We get thousands of letters from our readers and have counseled many. I have known very few parents who feel that their church’s youth group is beneficial. I have heard hundreds say, “The youth group or retreat is where we lost our children or where my daughter, who had never been kissed, got pregnant. It was the youth director that first introduced my son to porn, “etc.” In our counseling, many adults have told me that they lost their virginity on a church-sponsored event and even on the church property. I wish I could write a different story, but we base much of our knowledge on what our readers tell us.”
What’s wrong with teaching our children in our homes? Nothing! Yes, its against the popular culture of our time to have our children sit with us during worship and not to separate them into classes and to teach them the doctrines of the Bible around the kitchen table at home. Thus, we can say that it is not that all children will go into that far country of rebellion. We must teach, pray and point them towards the glory of God so they can be saved, and it must be done at home.
Brad L Horton
http://www.nogreaterjoy.org/articles/homeschooling/article-display/archive/1996/september/01/a-whole-way-of-life/
http://www.nogreaterjoy.org/articles/homeschooling/article-display/archive/2003/july/01/church-youth-group/
